Once upon a time, there was a little boy. This little boy had a father, and this little boy lived in the United States, where Christmas is revered by even the most dedicated of satanic worshippers. One fateful November, his father approached him to inquire about what he wanted for Christmas-- Of course, this boy had only 1 thing on his list: a copy of The Sims. He'd played the spin-off games before, but now he wanted the real thing. His father, disgruntled by the concept of a $40 Christmas gift, argued with his son incessantly to bargain for something cheaper (those rituals don't pay for themselves, you know...). It was no use, and that December 24th (divorced parents FTW!) the boy found himself with a copy of The Sims in his hands.

Perhaps my father's reluctance was the result of a premonition from Satan, who, in a change of heart, set out to prevent the explosive chain of events that would come from me obtaining this game.

~2000 hours and 13 unidentified dead bodies later, The Sims had changed the trajectory of my life forever.

Seriously though, I love this game. It is simply a fact of nature. The sky is blue, the grass is green, and Polly loves The Sims. This website's namesake, Lazlo Curious, is a premade sim from The Sims 2. I'm actually pretty crazy about him, but we'll get to that.

I have a lot of different things to say about this series, and I think those closest to me are tired of hearing about it. Click one of the links below to subject yourself to my incoherent ramblings!